Food You Don't Expect For Your Birthday

For his birthday, Foodgoat got just what he wanted: a case of military MRE's, or Meals Ready to Eat.











MREs are self-contained, individual rations in lightweight packaging designed for field conditions where organized food facilities are not available. They're designed to last 3 years in 80-degree weather; longer if stored in more optimal conditions.

Why would he want this? Peace of mind: we are set for at least a week should disaster strike. That can of Wolfgang Puck soup is just not going to cut it for us if we are hit by gamma rays from an exploding neutron star or Canada attacks Cleveland or if a volcano blows up in New York. (34 is apparently the age when paranoia strikes).

Plus, MREs have apparently come a long way from their days of being known as Meals Rejected by Everyone, Meals, Rarely Edible, or Three Lies for the Price of One (it's not a Meal, it's not Ready, and you can't Eat it). Nowadays, they are reputed to be quite palatable. The military changes up their menu of MREs every year based on feedback as well.

Typically, each MRE has:

• Entree - the main course, such as Spaghetti or Beef Stew
• Side dish - rice, corn, fruit, or mashed potatoes, etc.
• Cracker or Bread
• Spread - peanut butter, jelly, or cheese spread
• Dessert - cookies or pound cakes
• Candy
  
• Beverages - Gatorade-like drink mixes, cocoa, dairy shakes, coffee, tea
• Hot sauce or seasoning - in some MREs
• Flameless Heater - to heat up the entree
• Accessories - spoon, matches, creamer, sugar, salt, chewing gum, toilet paper, etc

Want to learn more about MREs? This site is loaded with information.

Since we have not actually been hit by gamma rays recently, we haven't yet tried eating any of the meals. But stay tuned for the next time the power goes out!!

One Food Hack, One Non-Food Hack

The food hack:

To prevent foods from sticking to the pan when pan frying or sauteing, preheat the pan before adding any oil or butter. Use the heat setting you intend to use when cooking (not high heat), and pre-heat for a few minutes. When is it ready? When the pan is about 180 degrees, or until it passes the "butter test": add a dab of butter on the bottom of the pan. If it bubbles briskly without burning, it's hot enough.

Add your oil and allow the oil to heat. Then throw in your food. No sticking to the pan!

This tip ended a long string of bad pan stickiness I've had lately.

Why it works:

I truly thought I read about this in Harold McGee's The Invisible Ingredient editorial, but re-reading it, I don't see it anywhere, so I'm at a loss as to where I heard it. But here's Foodgoat's best guess as to why it works -

When the metal pan is cold, its surface has actually rough, although it may look and feed quite smooth. Heat will cause this metal to expand, which causes the surface to even out and become smoother. But, if you add the oil when the pan is still cold, the oil gets into those surface hills and crevices, preventing it from smoothing out.

Oil added to a preheated surface, however, sits right on top of that surface, so that it acts as the slick, lubricating layer you need to keep food from sticking to the pan.

The Non-Food Hack

If, by chance, you should suck up the Wii Sensor bar with your vacuum cleaner, thereby mangling it beyond all recognition, you can still play with your Wii by lighting two candles, set about 9 inches apart, in front of your TV. Your Wiimote and all the games will work just as well with this super low tech sensor bar stand in. This is how we spent our Martin Luther King Jr. Day. It's really quite romantic.

Why it works:

The sensor bar doesn't actually sense anything, nor does it send any data to the Wii console. It just has two blue lights, one on each end, that the Wiimote uses to triangulate its position. It's the Wiimote that talks to the console. The sensor bar is just plugged into the console to power the lights. Candles provide the needed lights just as well.

Milk It For All It's Worth

Last Friday was National Milk Day, in honor of the first day, in 1878, that milk was first delivered in bottles.

Foodgoat is a longtime devoted milk drinker who routinely pours a big tall glass to go along with his dinner at home. But now, he has also made milk his drink of choice for lunch at work. While everyone else grabs a soda (or pop, if you must call it that) or a bottled water at the cafeteria, Foodgoat is among the few adults drinking milk along with their meal.

And why not? Maybe because buying milk at the cafeteria is sooo 3rd grade. But for Foodgoat, as in about 36% of those of Southern European descent, milk can continue to be a healthy, delicious option for adults as well as children. Milk, more nutritious and more filling than soda, has calcium and protein and a whole host of other vitamins and minerals. There's surprisingly a lot of controversy around the health benefits of milk, but I attribute it to the agitations and warmongering of vegans.

Me, I do not have dairy herding in my genes. I am among the 90-100% of Asians, who stop producing lactase, the enzyme required to digest milk, in adulthood, and thus can be found curled up and clutching their tummy after having a big a milkshake. Fortunately, there is yogurt.

Linkgoat

Minas Tirith during the Battle of Pelennor Fields ... in candy!


Here are the two food-related ones out of the 10 creepiest old ads ...

My Bologna Has an Ingredient, It's Mechanically Separated Poultry

Foodgoat didn't like bologna before, and he disliked it even more after learning (from the excellent episode of Modern Marvels about cold cuts) that one of the key ingredients was "mechanically separated chicken. "

You can figure out what this means. But maybe you can't, and if that's the case, it is:

... paste-like and batter-like poultry product produced by forcing bones, with attached edible tissue, through a sieve or similar device under high pressure to separate bone from the edible tissue.

Mmmmm!

Bologna, according to the USDA, is a hot dog (I take issue with that, but that's beside the point). So, according to the USDA, bologna can contain any amount of mechanically separated chicken or turkey but no more than 20% mechanically separated pork.

Fortunately, mechanically separated meat (MSM) must be labeled as such in the ingredients statement.

Not for fortunately, mechanically separated meat probably contains lower-quality protein than that found in meat from muscle tissue, and bone marrow, so it's higher in fat and cholesterol. Not to mention that it's just plain old gross-sounding.

Makes you want to go out and try that bologna bubble gum, doesn't it?